Some people call them priorities but to play off of my website name I am going to call them my necessities for a happy and healthy life. It is important to have some grounding necessities to help focus where your time should be spent. Our time is precious and looking around we seem to fill it very quickly with stuff. Is all that stuff important? Is it a necessity for your happiness? Does it bring you joy doing or having all that stuff? If it doesn’t bring you joy and does not fit into your necessities it is time to say “NO!” and politely move on or declutter it from your life. Saying “no” was very hard for me to learn because I was always a “yes” person and a people pleaser. I stressed myself out in the past trying to be everything for everybody and put myself through so much anxiety for it.
I plan my weeks out now, I keep things focused on my necessities I laid out for myself and it has been life changing! I know where my heart is and find those things to fill it. Yes, my schedule still can get hectic. I do have three kids, so things that are a necessity sometimes overlap or all land on one day. We make it work and it is not as stressful because we find joy even in those crazy days.
My top 5 necessities are …
- Grow in my faith, spirit and self care
- Husband and marriage – time for us, keep it fun and have activity centered dates
- Kids and family time together –one on one time with each child – create memories – be their mom and present in their life
- Health and Happiness – accountability, cooking healthy recipes, life balance, growing friendships, meal prepping, working out
- Hobbies bring me joy! – Time with my horse Balios, scrapbooking, teaching from home, positivity, adding value to others, BLOG Bair Necessity
Now it is your turn. Print out my Life Necessities Calendar and write out your 5 Necessities.
“If you want to know where your heart is look to where your mind goes when it wanders.”
Writing them out can bring a focus to your calendar you have never had before. As you go through your next month make a note of when you do something that aligns with one of your necessities. After the first week. see how you did. Did you balance your necessities well? Do you have one showing up more than the others. Is there one not even showing up on your calendar?
Reflect on that first week and maybe plan out the second week where you make a commitment to yourself that you will meet more of your necessities. Each week reflect and keep improving your focus on only filling your calendar with things that are part of your 5 necessities. By the end of the month you will have a good grasp on what needs to stay and what needs to go.
Have a goal each week to say “no” to one thing that does not fit into your necessities. It might be hard but it is freeing at the same time! You do not need to feel guilty, you do not need to explain why, just say “no” or “not at this time”. You got this! Write it down on your calendar when you do this. Praise yourself for making that choice to stay in control of your calendar.
It seems like a simple thing to do but it takes time to really stay committed to these 5 necessities. If you are lacking in one area, brainstorm ways to add it into your calendar more. Have a family meeting once a week to talk about your week ahead. I have a fantastic magnetic 7 day calendar that I LOVE to plan out my upcoming week on. The whole family sees it and knows what we have happening and it allows me to see how my necessities are showing up on a weekly basis. (The link above is an Amazon Affiliate Link. If you purchase through that link it will give a percentage to growing this website. Thank you!)
Here is a motivational speech by Matthew McConaughey that is so good not to take the time to listen to. He talks about decreasing our options so we have more focus on our necessities in life that bring us joy. It makes me think of our kids and how when they have SO many toys they end of playing with a cardboard box because they are too overwhelmed with the options. So us focusing on our 5 Top Necessities will decrease our options and give us more focus in our life. Enjoy the listen!
Let’s start this year off strong and in control of our time and our calendar! I am excited to hear all about it. Feel free to share your progress on my Facebook page so I can be an encourager in your life!
To stressing less and playing more,
Melissa 🙂
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